Happy Belated B-Day, America!

Yesterday, we silly Americans celebrated the 240th year of independence of our b-e-a-utiful country. Most of us probably ate too many hot dogs while listening to the distant sounds of fireworks, but we here at the Blumer house have a slightly different way of partying in the USA.

You see, we called permanent dibs on 3 parties per year: 4th of July, Halloween, and my birthday. My b-day has a new theme every year, Halloween is Halloween, and every year for the last three years we celebrate Fourth of JuLuau- a Fourth of July Luau.


Picture leis, tiki torches, pineapples and lots and lots of red, white, and blue and you get the general theme of Fourth Of Juluau (an idea we stole from the tv show Archer).


This is my husband rockin’ the shit out of his AmeriCats shirt.




We usually get a slip N slide for the occasion, but since it tends to be just me and my husband participating in the slippery fun, we got a pool instead. Nothing says “we classy” quite like a big ass above ground pool.



Gin bucket is my favorite party drink! It’s so easy to make and so refreshing. I, personally, love to drink it the correct way- straight outta the turkey baster. The other home run alcohol was my friend Jamie’s watermelon jello shots. Always a hit!


IMG_5580 (1)


Corn on the cob, kebabs, bratwursts, and burgers were on the menu. PLUS a freaking delicious Rum Ham that I made so we could pay tribute to our favorite TV show It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.


Fireworks, flip cup, and friends. The perfect alliteration to sum up our night.




Big thank you to my talented friend Jamie for not just the watermelon, but for taking all of the amazing pictures of the night.

Sisterhood Of The Traveling Dress


My BFFs and I share a lot of things: our deepest darkest secrets, unsolicited relationship advice, our last piece of gum, and, of course, our closets.  My Ride of Die, Main Bitch, Best Friend for the last 12 years, Allie, wore this gorgeous blush pink crochet dress as her bridesmaid dress for my wedding last month (I did the whole “here’s a color wear whatever the eff you want” approach to bridesmaids dresses- more on that later) and I fell in love with it! She wore her long dark hair parted down the middle with gold hoop earrings and lucite heeled nude shoes. She looked like a badass hippy queen.



With the last remaining pull on my Bride Card, I asked her if I could borrow the dress to take on my honeymoon and I would send it back to her after. Since you’re legally obligated to say “yes” to everything the bossy bride asks of you, she let me, and the idea of The Sisterhood was born.


We must now take The Dress on all of our trips and document it. Like Flat Stanley only less stupid and much more fashion forward…





I wore this Nasty Gal (sold out) number with my black fringe purse and black BCBG wedges  (the only heels and the only purse I brought) whilst galavanting around Venice, Italy. I don’t know what part of the dress I love more, the bell sleeves, the bare midriff, or the fact that it’s going to have a life of its own. This dress will see the world.


I guess the only bad part is now I have to send it back to Allie. The ball is in her court now. Wear it somewhere cool, giiiirl!


Venice Is For Lovers


Would any European honeymoon or couple’s vacation be complete without a trip to Venice? It is, after all, THE City of Love.


To be perfectly honest, when we got to Venice on a Sunday afternoon- totally exhausted after a long train ride- having to sashay through the plethora of sweaty tourists wearing fanny packs to get to our Airbnb was definitely not romantic in any way. Venice on a Sunday is insane in the membrane, yo. SO. DANG. CROWDED. Apparently, because so many visitors opt out of spending the night on the island(s), day trippers flock to Venice from mainland Italy in hoards on Sundays. “City of love?” I thought resentfully to myself, “they probably only call it that because Cassanova banged his way through town… more like City Filled With Idiots I’d Like To Push Into This Canal.”

We got off of our water taxi at the Rialto stop and went in search of our host who was meeting us at the square at Santa Maria Formosa… In true frustrated travelers form, we got lost. If you’ve been to Venice, you probably know how much of an unfriendly wheel city it is. No cars, no bikes, just assholes like us wheeling luggage around the cobblestone and up steps and over bridges. When we did eventually find our Italian supermodel hostess, she led us to our Airbnb, which was a little slice of Venetian heaven… bad mood cured instantly.



That first day in Venice was filled with the Italian treats I had been dreaming about all of my life: so much pizza and gelato with the most beautiful, historic views you could imagine. Plus, the humidity was working wonders on my freshly washed hair.




Venice is truly a magical place. Everywhere you look, you see beauty. Beauty and tourists and lots and lots of pigeons.





After exploring San Marco square and the surrounding area, we grabbed a prosciutto pizza (our second pizza in 4 hours) and some champagne to take home. We then spent the evening gazing at the most gigantic full moon from the top floor of our flat. Okay, Venice… You ARE the City Of Love. I salute thee.




In case you find yourself wondering, the answer is no… we did not take a gondola ride. We don’t regret our decision either. I do, however, regret not taking more pictures of all the pizza I ate….




Along with my dark pink YSL lipstick and some hair extensions, I left a piece of my heart in Venice… xoxo

How To Add POPS Of Color To Your Home


I don’t know about you, but I love color! When it comes to home decor, though, I prefer to work with a more neutral palette for the permanent parts (grey walls + white trim FTW!), and then throw in some interchangeable pops of color here and there. This method is good for two big reasons: 1. it’s renter friendly (I know a lot of people stuck with white or beige walls because landlords can be dickheads!) and, 2. I get bored and want to change up the colors of our home periodically, and it might be kind of difficult to paint the dining room depending on my mood. Here are my personal favorite, tried and true methods of making our house more colorful:

  • Fresh flowers. A big fat DUH! Lavender roses, pink peonies, orange daisies- the possibilities are endless. Trader Joe’s always has a great selection of blooms to chose from.
  • Pillows. I am constantly rotating the pillows in our house from downstairs to guest room to our bedroom. We have so many good ones to chose from! The best pillow sources: Society 6, IKEA, Leif, Urban Outfitters, Lulu and Georgia, and Target. Pillows are ridiculously easy to make yourself too, so keep that in mind next time you’re at a fabric store.


  • Shower Curtain. I specifically picked out this shower curtain because it had the colors I wanted to add to our mostly neutral bathroom. Also, science.


  • SOAP! This is my all time favorite way of adding color! I picked out these soap dispensers with the intention of buying brightly colored soaps to fill them with. I was so happy the first time we ran out of green soap because it meant we could use pink!


  • Fill a glass terrarium. Painted rocks, anyone? I had ordered some wood block garland that I took apart and spray painted. We used this and one other terrarium with colorful blocks at the bottom as card containers at our wedding. I loved the look so much I kept them how they were. One is a centerpiece at our table and the other is in our entryway.


  • Display your colorful nail polish. I love the look of multicolored little uniform bottles on a shelf. It’s why I spend so much money on Essie brand polish.


  • Spray paint your knick knacks. This creepy cat was an ugly greyish brown before I made him gold.


  • Paint your door! Technically this might not be “renter friendly”, but my sister and I totally did this (sans landlord’s permission) at the little house we used to rent together. It’s much more permanent than the other options, but doors are SOOO easy to paint!


I don’t know, man, I think this was all pretty solid decor advice. You’re welcome! Don’t say I never taught you anything…

The Whiz Palace: Before & After


W.C., loo, bathroom, restroom, washroom, powder room, lavatory, toilet; whatever you want to call it, the whiz palace is probably the most used room in any home today. Sure you spend a lot of time cooking in your kitchen, sleeping in your bedroom, and maybe watching t.v. in your living room, but the bathroom is where shit goes down… literally. Gross, sorry, that got away from me for a second there…

As a girl who puts on makeup everyday, likes to relax in the bathtub, and is always in need of a place to hide from people at parties, the restroom is kind of my sanctuary.


Now, full disclosure, I definitely did not hate the pink and black thing happening in the main bathroom of the house when I first saw it, but it needed some serious updating so it turned into a full gut job. There was a bulkhead hanging so low in the shower that Joel couldn’t stand up straight, so I bashed it right out of there. If you’ve never had the opportunity to smash and bash and tear tile down, I feel bad for you, It’s the best part of any renovation. The clean up, i.e. the million trips back and forth to the rented dumpster in the driveway, however, is not as much fun…

Several months later and wouldya just look at this!


The combination of faux marble peel & stick floor tile, white subway tile + grey grout around the tub, a badass vessel sink, a colorful shower curtain, and a working soft close toilet really ties the room together.



If you have the pleasure of visiting our whiz palace, be sure to notice the original 2011 Sarah Blumer artwork hanging above the toilet. I call it “Lord Of The Flies”. Not surprisingly, almost no women ever get to really appreciate it because of it’s location in proximity to the porcelain throne.



My friend, Rachel, gave me this bathroom guest book as a wedding shower gift and, NO JOKE, it has more signatures than our wedding guest book. People draw/write the most hilarious/disgusting stuff in there…



Who doesn’t love a good bubble bath? Rhetorical question.



There you have it! The very first “fully finished” renovated room of our home. Someone alert HGTV because we have a lot more house to see!


Hallo, Munich!


I have a very important piece of travel advice for my fellow newbie world travelers:  BRING A TRAVEL JOURNAL AND WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN! Since we were taking trains from each city to the next, I spent the first 30 0r so minutes describing, in as much detail as possible, our experiences in the city we had just left. If I hadn’t been writing all of this down, I don’t think I would have even remembered our road raging Uber driver, our sweet Airbnb host who had an uncanny resemblance to the drummer of Mutemath, or the group of teenage girls that tried to push me over on the subway in Munich, Germany.


If you ask Joel, my husband, what his favorite place we visited on our honeymoon was he would say Munich hands down! And I can see why, Munich is amazing. We stayed here which was absolutely perfect. Not only was our flat adorable and centrally located to restaurants and the train and subway stations, but our host left us delicious German snacks and chocolate: WIN, WIN, WIN.



We didn’t have set plans for any of the places we visited, only ideas of things we knew we wanted to do. The only thing on our list for Munich was to visit the Hofbrauhaus and its neighboring beer gardens/breweries. We did just so on our first night in town! The Hofbrauhaus was not as touristy as I was expecting it to be, but had tons of locals who had reserved the same family tables for hundreds of years! On the third floor is a giant hall filled to the brim with people drinking and singing in German. Oh, the camaraderie is contagious up there! People of all different nationalities standing on their chairs to chug their beers while the whole room cheered them on then high fives all around. You couldn’t help but smile at the whole scene!

Across the street from HB, is a much smaller beer garden called Augustiner, that a sweet reader of the blog recommended. The beer was delicious, but I couldn’t get over the history of the place! Augustiner has been in Munich since the 14th century! Holy crap, right?! My fellow Americans should be impressed because Christopher Colombus wasn’t even born when the first Augustiners were being poured.

We also went to Ayinger to sit outside and people watch at the busy beer centered square. You wouldn’t believe how many bachelorette parties we saw!





On the map left for us by our host, we saw Olympic Park (where the 1972 Summer Games were held) and decided it seemed worth checking out. We hopped on the subway that led us right to the park. It was a beautiful sunny, cool day! Perfect park weather!




Bavarian food is my freakin’ favorite. The bratwurst on the right with the mayonnaise and mustard is mine.


As soon as we got off of our train and into the park, we saw multiple signs pointing to a Star Wars exhibit called “Star Wars Identities”. Obviously our nerdy curiosity got the best of us and we paid 20 euro each to check it out. It was cool that we got to create our very own Star Wars characters, BUT OMFG THEY HAD THE ACTUAL SLAVE LEIA COSTUME, HAN SOLO IN CARBONITE, BOBA FETT, R2D2, AND EVERY OTHER STAR WARS THING YOU MIGHT CARE ABOUT FROM THE ACTUAL MOVIES ON DISPLAY. Learn more about Identities here and definitely go if it comes to your city!



I think we were a little distracted by the displays because this is how our characters came out: I’m a sexy pink Ewok and Joel is a lizard bounty hunter.


I will never ever stop gushing to people about Munich and how much we loved it. What an amazing city! With the exception of the wild pack of teenage girls on the subway, everyone was so nice and accommodating to us silly Americans. We attempted to say our “hellos” and “pleases” and “thank yous” in German, but just about everyone in Munich speaks English.



We were sad to leave Munich so early on a Sunday morning, but a 6 hour train ride through the Austrian Alps and Italian country side was waiting for us. Next up: Venice.

Garden Party Hardy



Road tripping four hours to Virginia is totally worth it if it’s for a wedding. Virginia is for lovers after all, so when Joel’s college buddy invited us to witness his and his beloved’s Garden Party nuptials last weekend, we happily obliged. The whole time we were there, I was wishing I had brushed up on my Garden Party knowledge by reading the quintessential Garden Party book: The Ultimate Guide To Throwing A Garden Party by James Trickington.



I wore the prettiest low back J.O.A. dress (similar one here) with my blue wedding shoes and my Rolling Stones clutch. Just as I was double checking to make sure I was wearing the coolest shoes of anyone in the room, I noticed a wedges trend happening among the other ladies in attendance… Note to self: heels aren’t so great in grass/dirt.



This is one of many weddings Joel and I have been to together, but the first as a married couple, and we loved going as guests all the more this time around. It’s so fun going to a wedding where you did 0% of the planning! Just show up with a gift and have fun! Yeah! My favorite part of a wedding is watching the newlywed couple together at the reception. I think that if those two are having fun, everyone else will too!


T-minus 6 weeks until we get our wedding photos! BYEEEEEE.

a little insight to a not-so-complicated girl