All posts by sarahblumer

Beach, Please.

We all know that one Emerson quote (frequently used to caption Instagram posts) that says something about living in the sunshine, swimming in the sea, and drinking the wild air, riiiight? Although it was a quote ruined by basic bitches, it’s still a good one. There is something so purifying about being near the sea.

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Right now it is 19 degrees in Pittsburgh and there is fresh snowfall on the ground. I am beyond grateful that I got to spend my birthday weekend visiting friends in sunny AF south Florida with my husband. I hope that the memories of the colorful lifeguard stands of South Beach and the crystal clear waters of Ft Lauderdale can carry me through the winter. At the very least, I have enough blog material to pretend like I’m somewhere sunny for the rest of the year…

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Sweater/Wildfox (similar), Swimsuit/Target

Cats Vs Christmas Decor

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Joel and I are pretty much the epitome of “cat people”, but somehow when we adopted Peter and Dee last October, we got stuck with the most dog-like kittens I’ve ever met. Sweet Dee loves to play fetch with wrappers. Peter Nincompoop loves belly rubs and chasing his tail. Thank God they don’t have to be walked outside to poop or I’d contemplate a no refund return of these assholes (KIDDING, OBVIOUSLY, WE LOVE THEM WAY TOO MUCH!).

Last November, we put up our Christmas tree as a family of four and didn’t think much about what our children cats would do about it. The next morning, on my way to turn on the coffee pot, I screamed as I cut my foot on something. When I turned on the lights, I saw that our floor was littered with broken ornaments. Cool! A few days later, after getting into the habit of turning the lights on before going downstairs, I saw a trail made of tufts of fur leading all the way from the tree up the stairs and into the bathroom… It was the stuffed raccoon ornament my mother-in-law had given me the year before, torn to shreds by Peter. Lovely!

Somehow, these little dummies were smart enough to do all of their dirty work when we were either asleep or at work. We’d come home and they’d practically say “it wasn’t me” when there’d be cat sized gaps in the Christmas tree (cat translation: “meow meowwww meow”). The cycle continued until we put away our Christmas tree early, before New Year’s Day whereas it used to stay up until Valentine’s. Womp Womp.

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“I’m gonna tear that shit up later” -Peter

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Well, call us crazy because we not only put up the tree with our old glass ornaments, but we surrounded the kitty house with lights as well- definitely a recipe for disaster (see also: the fate of the cat in Christmas Vacation). The only preventative measure we took this year has been leaving our little Yoda dressed as Santa ornament in a cabinet far far away because Peter Boy will eat him; that and we now have a spray bottle that is used if they even look like they’re getting any ideas about messing with the tree/lights…

So far, so good. I’ve only seen 2 broken ornaments and the gold sequin tree skirt (it’s actually the sweetheart table tablecloth from our wedding) is only sometimes askew. Maybe our babies are just growing up! Most likely, though, keeping the spray bottle pointed at the tree through the night is helping to stop Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb from acting out…

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Cats-2, Christmas Tree-0, Spray Bottle- (too many to count)

Another Blumer Birthday!

Just two weeks and two days after my husband’s birthday, comes MINE (Joel is two years, two weeks, and two days older than me)! Since turning 28 isn’t as big of a deal as turning 30, I recycled Joel’s balloons instead of getting my own with the correct numbers… You get the idea though: TODAY’S MY BIRTHDAY!!!!

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I have a tendency to make way too big of a deal out of my birthday (I went to New Orleans last year and had this party the year before), and this year is no different. We’re heading to sunny Florida for the weekend, which is perfect timing because it’s supposed to snow in PGH on Saturday. BYEEEEE.

While we’re on the subject of birthdays, I guess I should wish a very happy one to my Uncle David, Nikki Minaj, and my very own twin sister, Bessie. Hope y’all have birthdays for the books!

Fringe Worthy

There comes a time in many a woman’s life where she contemplates getting bangs. I have found myself, once again, at this particular crossroads. To bang, or not to bang, that is the question…

Long story short: I banged. I banged harder than a Ricky Martin song. This is my life now. I have bangs.

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A couple years ago, I used some scissors from my BFF’s craft room and cut my own bangs, which my cousin fixed the next day. I liked my straight across,  blunt, Zooey Deschanel bangs, but opted for Sienna Miller curtain bangs this time around. Some more bangin’ inspiration:

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On Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in the chair at my salon and right as my stylist was lifting his shears, I panicked and awkwardly seconded guessed all of the choices I’d made in my life that lead me to think that bangs were a good idea. He then gave me a look that said “get your shit together/ hair grows, dummy/there are more important things happening in the world to think and worry about other than your hair”.

Did I regret my decision to get bangs? Oh, immediately. But I have since gone through the five stages of grief that I always go through when I cut my hair:

  1. denial “oh no I DID NOT just get bangs”
  2. anger “EFF THESE BANGS! I HATE THEM!”
  3. bargaining “okay okay I’ll pay you double if you can glue that hair on the floor back onto my head”
  4. depression “WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY, GOD, WHY?!” *hysterical crying*
  5. acceptance “I’m going to save a fortune on makeup for my giant forehead”
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me, pulling off curtain bangs circa 1994
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Blunt bangs circa 2012
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No Drama Tee/Ban.do (similar), Jeans/Madewell, Sunglasses/Amazon

Now, if you all will excuse me… I have to go get to know this weirdo version of myself I keep seeing in the mirror.

Binge Worthy

Speaking of wearing robes and being cozzzzyyyy…

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It’s the most wonderful time of the year!!!! My favorite part of the holiday season is the part with no plans in sight and nothing to do. Does it count as “dolce far niente” if the TV is on? Yes, it does. I’ve done my research, and have found the best shows to binge watch (and which to avoid) during your well deserved time off. So kick back, relax, and turn on the ROKU.

NETFLIX

  1. The Office/30 Rock/ Parks and Rec- The holy trinity of goofiness. Everyone needs some comic relief in their life! We re-watch one of these annually and rotate between them.
  2. Breaking Bad- Seriously, this show is probably the best show ever made and it’s EVEN BETTER when you go back and watch it again. So many Easter Eggs and so much foreshadowing!
  3. Gossip Girl- I was v anti GG when it first aired because I was loyal to the books, but what started as a guilty pleasure show to watch while I drink coffee in the mornings or when Joel’s working late, has turned into a full-on addiction. So bad, it’s good.
  4. Pretty Little Liars- FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT GET SUCKED INTO WATCHING THIS. We made the mistake of binging the first two seasons when we had the flu and it was such a waste of time because nothing ever happens.
  5. Skins (British Version)- I may be pushing 28, but I guess I have this thing with teenage drama.
  6. The Great British Bake- YAAAAAAAAS, but don’t watch if you’re hungry.

 

HULU

  1. The OC- Speaking of teenage drama, this show singlehandedly shaped my youth. I was obsessed in 2004 and with the exception of the fashion choices and the cameo appearance of Paris Hilton in season 1, it holds up. Even the last season was not as terrible as I remembered it.
  2. The Mindy Project- Danny and Mindy 4ever!
  3. Younger- Another guilty pleasure show that I couldn’t turn off.
  4. The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills- If you’re going to watch any housewives series, this is the ones to commit to because they’re the most glamorous and the most dramatic.
  5. The Handmaid’s Tale- One of those rare occurrences where the movie/tv adaptation is better than the book!

 

AMAZON PRIME

  1. The Grand Tour- IDGAF about cars, but Joel got me looooving this show! It’s so over the top and ridiculous, plus I love me some dry British humor.
  2. The Man In The High Castle- Nope, sorry. Great concept and cool intro, but terrible execution.
  3. Z: The Beginning of Everything- I read the book version of Zelda Fitzgerald’s life and loved it! I only watched the first episode of the show, but my BFF and sister love it and I trust their opinions.

 

Well, it’s been fun, but I have to go see what happens between Blair Waldorf and Chuck Bass… Happy binge season to you all!

XOXO, Gossip Girl Sarah

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How To Get Away With Wearing PJs In Public

Fashion, much like art, is at times simply “what you can get away with“….

IDK about you, but I am definitely an advocate for wearing pajamas in public places. I’ve been known to go to the movie theatre in an American Flag print nightgown (worn as a dress, obviously) and I’ve graced quite a few strangers at the grocery store with the presence of my Darth Vader boxer briefs (I originally bought them for my husband, but kept them for myself). Since it can be annoyingly difficult to find “dressy” clothing that can hold a candle to the comfort of sleep clothes, I decided to test drive wearing a bathrobe in lieu of a jacket to see if I could get away with it.

Long story short: If you looked up “pulling it off” in the dictionary, you’d probably find these photos.

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Bathrobe/Target, Skirt and Top/SheIn, Sunglasses/Forever21, Mules/ASOS

Speaking of bathrobes, when we were getting ready for Paris back in September, I ordered this beautiful floral kimono to wear around the city of lights. When I opened the package from my online purchase, Joel said “ohhh that’s a pretty bathrobe” and that’s part of where the inspiration for this post came from. Bathrobes (and bathrobe inspired kimonos) are, like, so IN this season.

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“Is that a bathrobe?!” -The man in the striped shirt

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Floral Bathrobe Kimono/Zara

Confidence is key to wearing pajamas in public. Just try not to accessorize with a shower cap and/or bunny slippers and you’ll be golden.

Blumer Birthday!

HAPPY 30th BIRTHDAY TO MY FAVORITE PERSON, BEST FRIEND, CAT DIDDY, PARTNER IN REAL ESTATE AND PARTNER IN LIIIIIIFE, MY HUSBAND, JOEL TIGER BLUMER!!!!

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I have a lot to be thankful for in life and having Joel is always at the top of the list. Turning 30 is a big freaking deal and I’m so glad I get to celebrate with you!

p.s. this post counts as the written portion of your birthday gift. xoxo.