Bridal Shower

I’ve been to two bridal showers in my life and they were both, well, pretty GD boring (more like bridull shower, amIright?!). I remember the most exciting part of my cousin’s shower was when she unwrapped a Dutch Oven and I immaturely cry-laughed for a solid 5 minutes. Her Vegas themed baby shower, complete with a Craps Table, beer served in baby bottles, and a game of pin the sperm on the egg while wearing a baby daddy face mask, was much more my speed.

And then I saw the movie Bridesmaids, which completely changed the potential of any bridal shower…

FEELINGS BEFORE MY SHOWER: I can only hope at my bridal shower tomorrow that someone has a mental breakdown and calls me a “LESBIANNNNNN!” and then proceeds to “eat that fucking cookie”. But, I’m really mature now, so if it ends up being a bunch of girls watching me try not to break the bows as I unwrap all of the gifts that I picked out for myself, so be it….

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FEELINGS AFTER SHOWER: My shower was last Saturday, which you totally know if you follow me on Snapchat. Although there were parts that were awkward- like when I couldn’t bend my legs to sit down in my too tight jumpsuit (I brought an outfit change knowing this could be a potential problem) or when the leather on my chair kept making fart sounds and I had to loudly profess “THAT WAS THE CHAIR” or when I had to open gifts in front of people who looked bored to tears- I still had a lot of fun. Joel’s perfect and beautiful sisters came into town and they are always a blast to hang out with. All of my girlfriends and new family sat around and drank pink champagne and told me how pretty I looked. My future MIL Sheila, BFF Jess, and sister Annie really went above and beyond when it came to capturing the essence of Sarah in the decor: there were books and succulents everywhere.

And I gotta say… It feels especially good to have our entire bedroom completely furnished now thanks to my meticulously curated Target registry! So thank you for showering me, ladies of Pittsburgh!

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