Asheville, NC

Charming, delightful, quaint, adorable, and pleasant are all synonyms for “cute” (according to the thesaurus app on my phone); also, they can all be used to describe the city of Asheville. Asheville, North Carolina has been at the top of our “must visit” U.S. cities list for a while now. We’ve all heard from someone who knows someone who loves it there, right? When my friends evacuated Florida last hurricane season, they took a family trip to Asheville and loved it so much they wanted to move there! After visiting for a few days last month, I can totally see why…



First of all, the food. The very first place we went to in Asheville was White Duck Taco Shop located at the edge of the River Arts District of town. For the love of all that is holy, their Bahn Mi style tofu taco was soooo freaking good. They have a taco/beer happy hour special that we took advantage of and our dinner was less than $20. Boo ya!






Although we eat mostly “whole food, plant based” (look at us, we’re practically vegan!) at home, we don’t usually stick to this style whilst on vacay. We, like, couldn’t not go to Luella’s BBQ while we were in town. Even though they have tempeh options on their menu, I still opted for a giant plate of meat which was delicious… But eating too much meat too quickly = about-to-pop, food baby bloat. I’ll try to slow down next time, but I really can’t make any promises.



There are so many great breweries in Asheville! We stopped at Archetype on our first night in town and loved the atmosphere. We drank beers, played a made up, 2 person version of Cards Against Humanity, and listened to a folk musician jam session.





We didn’t actually go to this restaurant, but check out that banana leaf wallpaper inside!

Joel was really excited to find out there’s a New Belgium brewery in Asheville. This place was impressive, not to mention pretty busy for a Tuesday afternoon. I loved how once you show you’re of age to drink, you get your hand stamped with a bearded hipster dude. Cool!




look: a rainbow!

It really seemed that everywhere you look in Asheville, you see charm. Next time we go there, we are totally staying at the Mountaineer Inn (they have “tasty vittles” and a “cement pond”- whatever that means!).


Don’t even get me started on the street art! I’ve never seen so many adorably painted parking lots!


na na na na na na na na, BATMAN!





the coolest stuff we’ve ever seen, for sure.

We’ve been trying to get a Blumer Family vacation on the books ever since I officially joined the Blumer Family and we think Asheville would be the perfect place to meet up! There was so much we didn’t see/do this time around, like visiting The Biltmore or eating at Biscuit Head, which is all the more reason to go back! WE FRIGGIN’ LOVE YOU, ASHEVILLE!





Anti-Social Media

Alternate title for this post: Deep Thoughts About Shallow Things

Is there anyone more annoying than a Facebook “friend” you don’t know that well who pops up on your feed and melodramatically announces that they’re deleting Facebook friends? “If you’re reading this, you’re SO lucky you made the cut because I just went on a deleting friends spree.” Good for you, Bruce! p.s. NOBODY GIVES A SHIT.

Back in March, I took an Irish Exit from my most used social media accounts, Facebook and Instagram. No goodbyes, just a quick touch of a “deactivate my account” button, a “yes, I’m sure” button, and “none of your fucking business” button (do you really need to know why I’m leaving, Mark Z-burg?!) and POOF! No more Facebook! I don’t miss it at all. As for Instagram, I only deleted the app from my phone and plan to go back to it sometime in the future, but not quite yet…

If the fact that I haven’t been on the Social Media Scene is brought up to me, it’s usually followed by a casual/nonchalant “why’d ya leave?” to which I ever-so-eloquently answer “eh idk just because“. Even though an Instagram account is something so stupidly paltry and doesn’t really matter at all, me taking a break from it was little more complicated than “just because”. Since I can’t articulate this aloud without sounding like a grade A nut job, I decided to write it out here… on my blog, where I can put my crazy lady thoughts “on paper”, so to speak.

gettin’ the ‘gram (*eye roll emoji*)

As far as Facebook is concerned, it’s just all around annoying. Facebook has also been giving me the creeps for a while now, too. Like when my college stalker kept sending me messages or when ads were popping up for stuff I had been talking out loud to my sister about (I hadn’t even done a google search yet). I just, ughhhhhhh, don’t care if you’re waiting in line somewhere or how your day is going, Karen, gosh.

“did you get it? did you get the ‘gram?”

Instagram is a little more complicated, though. I loved Instagram! I loved having an outlet for artistically shot and edited photos of me doing cool stuff, our house, our cats, and places we’ve travelled to. I loved how curated I was making my life look! I loved connecting with interesting people around the world and gaining inspiration from artistically shot and edited photos of them doing cool stuff! Then all of a sudden, it got to be too much. When we were in Austin, I was obsessively upgrading Instagram stories with the cool stuff we were seeing instead of just enjoying it as it was happening. Not only was I annoying the living daylights out of myself because of my weird, incessant need to post on Instagram, but I soon started to recognize feelings that one should not be feeling on social media, let alone anywhere else…

  1. Lust- example: lusting after someone else’s trip to Greece.
  2. Envy- example: envious of someone else’s baby bump (what can I say? it’s that stupid biological clock ticking away at me)
  3. Gluttony- example: wanting to literally eat my phone when I saw a picture of someone else’s brunch.
  4. Greed- example: I don’t want to tag where I got these shoes on sale because then someone else will have them too.
  5. Wrath- example: loathing and being annoyed to the point of anger at how stuck up one of the world’s most famous fashion blogger comes off (that’s not very feminist of me, is it?!)
  6. Sloth- example: I don’t want to get up, I just want to scroll through this for 5 more hours, k?
  7. Pride- example: I am so much better than someone else.

Yeah. The seven deadly sins brought to you by Instagram. It’s like my Instagram Persona had Narcissistic Personality Disorder or something. How ridiculously stupid is that? I am fully aware of how dumb my feelings were, but I can’t help feeling my feelings any more than you can (hey at least it’s proof that i’m not a robot). The choice to take a step back from being “social” and reflect came easily to me because social media isn’t part of my actual profession, but rather just a hobby. I didn’t want my life to become an episode of Black Mirror (which we just started watching and, OMG, we love it). Yes, my blog views have plummeted without having social media as a tool to remind people to read it, but I don’t care.

Eventually, I’ll get out of my own head about something as trivial as my presence on social media and try to pick up where I left off without going down the rabbit hole. I just don’t want checking my phone for anything except the time to be such a reflex, ya know? I don’t want to ever measure my life by “likes” and “comments” and “shares”. I don’t want to be just another millennial who says “hold on, can you do that again? I want to make an Insta Story of it” on a regular basis. I gotta chill the eff out.

If you need me or miss me, you can find me here on this blog as well as Words With Friends (yes I still play that), Pinterest, and most recently, Good Reads. If you’re really lucky, maybe you’ll even see me IRL! Wouldn’t that be sweet?! Too bad I’m much cooler on the Internet…

“wait, babe, take a picture of me using my phone as a mirror to put on this lipstick”


Nashville, TN

For the most part, tourists are drawn to Nashville because it’s a place to shake your Honky Tonk Badonkadonk (here’s hoping this song gets stuck in your head now, too) and let your country music loving freak flag fly (say that 5 times fast). Although there was a small window in my early twenties where I’d jam to some country music above any other genre and yeah, sure, I tricked my grandpa into buying me cowboy boots back in the day (wore them once), that’s not my scene anymore. Now that I’m a boring old lady who listens solely to 80s rock music and lives in her falling apart Kate Spade booties, I guess the city of Cleveland is more my speed…

But since we have family in the shape of my sister-in-law, Laura, her husband, Todd, and their baby girl, Lola, living in Nashville, it was the perfect first stop for our Spring Road Trip.

“B b b bottle and the jets” – Lola AKA Baby Elton John


First of all… Lola. Honestly, if we’d never left Todd and Laura’s home and just hung out with Lola the entire trip, we would have been happy. She peers directly into your soul with her big, beautiful blue eyes. Joel and I love being uncle and aunt to this lil’ pierogi and we’re so excited to get to see her (as well as her new cousin, baby Beckett) grow up!


Because Laura is an actual, real life (gets paid) blogger, she gets invited to blogger events. And because I love getting free stuff and spending quality time with my sister from another mister, I went with her to one. This particular event was held at Lemon Laine, a natural beauty and wellness shop located in East Nashville. This is one of those dangerous stores where you want. to buy. EVERYTHING. We got facials, tried out Tata Harper products, ate tasty treats, and got to talk to fellow admirers of natural living. Even though I took off all of my makeup and had to show off my monster cheek pimple to a room full of strangers, it was still a great time! And I’m definitely going to invest in some Tata Harper products because my monster cheek pimple disappeared overnight… Hallelujah!






I’ve got one tasty, made up word for you: Cronut. When a croissant and a donut make a baby, it’s called a cronut and it’s delicious. Normally, I can’t finish an entire donut without getting a little sick to my stomach because they’re just too sweet, but I swear I could wolf down a dozen of these things and only regret it mildly. So good!!! Five Daughters Bakery is a must if you’re visiting Nashville. Thank me later.


Lola can’t have cronuts yet, hence the face she’s making.


Another new treat we tried and loooooved, was coffee soda at Steadfast Coffee. It’s coffee, it’s soda, it’s amazing. Don’t read too much into it and just be pleasantly surprised when you try it.

bitch stole my look.


On Saturday night, Laura and Todd got a sitter for Lola so we adults could go out for a night on the town. We dressed up nicely and went to Le Sel for pomme frites at frilly drinks. Remember when I said that Joel and I didn’t go to any fancy restaurants when we were in Paris? Well, Le Sel totally made up for that! The pink velvet booths + black and white accents were très beau. Got a lot of future home decor inspo from there for sure!





We couldn’t go to Nashville and not at least witness Broadway at night, could we?! It was extra crazy because it was St. Patrick’s day! If you find yourself driving by the hockey stadium in Nashville, roll down your window and yell “Phil Kessel is a Stanley Cup champion” as loudly as your lungs will allow (our hockey team totally annihilated their hockey team last year #sports).




Todd and Laura’s home is seriously so beautiful! If it looks like it belongs in a magazine, that’s because, NBD, it has been (HGTV magazine)! Everywhere you look, it’s perfectly decorated. Even when it’s “messy”, it’s cute, and we loved just hanging out there.






Barista Parlor is by far the most hipster coffee place I’ve ever been to. Me, Laura, and Lola wore our matching Metallica shirts when we went there. Gosh, we’re cool.




For our Nashville grand finale, we ordered Five Points Pizza. Holy Crap. THE BEST PIZZA I’VE EVER HAD. Even my pizza snob husband said it was tied for first place with his favorite Pittsburgh Pizza.




It’s not easy having so many family living out of state, especially now that we have a little niece and nephew. Though I have dreams of creating an entire community on a private island for all of my relatives one day, it’s great to be able to visit and explore cities that might otherwise take a back seat to travel priorities! We love Nashville and can’t wait to go back! (note to self: buy a jug of coffee soda next time)



Next stop: ASHEVILLE!

Road Trip, OMG!

This post is sponsored by Subaru. Love- it’s what makes a Subaru a JK THIS AIN’T SPONSORED (but I do love my Subaru).


Imagine for a second that you’re twelve years old. At that age, if you were given the option to spend your summer A) leaving your home state for the first time and partaking in an epic, cross country road trip with your godmother and two of your sisters, or B) staying home and being semi-spoiled by your parents for being the only girl in the house; which would you choose?

In 2002, I chose option A. We took our sweet time driving from Texas to North Carolina, making all sorts of stops along the way. From there we also went on to visit Philadelphia, DC, NYC, Myrtle Beach, and a few other places. Although I did have a tiny bit of FOMO when my sister (the idiot who actually wanted to stay home so she could train our family dog to love only her [which totally worked, btw]) called and said she saw my crush at Sam’s Club, I still consider this the best summer of my adolescence. ROAD TRIPS FTW!

Since that initial trip, I’ve been on a few other monumental (20+ hours in the car is considered pretty monumental, yeah?) road trips. You see, there are some subtle differences between a Road Trip and your average long car ride. On a long car ride, you go from one place to another in one take, like when we drove down to Atlanta (12 hours from Pittsburgh) to visit family or going to/from New Orleans and San Antonio in my early twenties (only 8 hours to get to NOLA from SA). But on a road trip, you make it a point to stop and see stuff OR you have more than one destination.

Because we seem to have this nagging need to be elsewhere when we have time off of work, Joel and I recently took a road trip from Pittsburgh to Nashville to Asheville and back again.  To Nashville because Joel’s never been and his sister, her husband, and their sweet daughter live there so it doubled as new place to explore and family bonding time. To Asheville because we’ve heard nothing but great things about it plus it rhymes with Nashville, so there’s that.


I wrote down a list of things that will make any road trip an enjoyable experience.

  1. Podcasts (uhhhh duh)– my favorites are Hidden Brain, Super Soul Conversations, Radio Lab, and Bulletproof Radio. We’re also pretty into True Crime (who isn’t?!), but haven’t been able to find a good crime podcast since season 1 or Serial… What are your favorite podcasts?
  2. Healthy Snacks– we made turkey wraps and brought cut up bell peppers to eat on the way to Nashville. On a road trip, you don’t want to eat anything that will be in any way upsetting to your stomach… Let’s just say the only gas you want in your car is the kind that makes it go…
  3. OVERPACKING– there are no TSA travel regulations in your own car, so you can totes bring a tote bag full of full size toiletries. Can’t zip your large duffel bag because it’s bursting at the seams with clothes you probably won’t even get a chance to wear? No worries! Throw it in the trunk and fuggettaboutit.
  4. Cozy Clothes– the floral sweatpants I’m wearing in the photo below are the least flattering, but most comfortable thing I’ve ever worn.
  5. Good Company– not that a solo road trip wouldn’t be fun, but having my dumb BFF by my side is always my favorite way to travel. Barf, that was sweet, huh?



We hit a small patch of bad weather on our way home, but other than that it was a great trip! Stay tuned for Nashville and Asheville posts coming soon…

Austin, TX

Unless you live under a rock, you’ve probably heard how cool of a city Austin, TX is. It is the OG “weird” city (sorry Portland, we were “keeping Austin weird” way before you guys, but thanks for sending Voodoo Donuts to the Lone Star State). It is the blue epicenter in the middle of a very red state. Austin has been and always will be many a hipsters’ Holy Land.

I started escaping to Austin when I was in high school. I would skip school and bum a ride an hour north of San Antonio to spend the day exploring a very explorable city. There’s always something happening in Austin, as it is the live music capital of the world. I have so many great memories of concerts in the capital city of Texas, like at SXSW when I snuck in through the VIP section to see The Strokes, or when Explosions In The Sky put on an amazing fireworks show over Lady Bird Lake for their finale. I saw Stevie Wonder at Austin City Limits in 2012 (but he did not see me). I got kicked out of a Mickey Avalon concert (not my fault) at the old Emo’s, and I climbed out of a bathroom window and onto the roof at the iconic Paramount Theatre during a New Year’s Eve Bob Schneider show…

But music is not all Austin has to offer. The food! The nightlife! The friendly drunk people on 6th street! The general atmosphere of this city makes it the reason we’d live there if we were to ever move back to Texas.


Our recent trip to Austin was, unfortunately, pretty limited. We took a Megabus from San Antonio on Monday morning and flew out of the Austin airport and back to Pittsburgh that same evening. We sure did cram a lot into that short time frame, though!

I gotta take a minute to share my new found love of both Megabus and the Austin airport. Holy crap, it was the best transportation day of my liiiiiiife! My friend said she used to take the 1.5 hour long bus ride to and from Austin to party with friends on weeknights and be back for work in San Antonio the next morning. It’s such a cozy ride, you don’t even mind having to sit in the notoriously bad Austin traffic because you can watch movies on your laptop (free wifi!), and you get dropped off right in the middle of downtown by the UT campus. If you’re visiting Austin and want to experience the best tacos in all of Texas, hop on a Megabus and go to San Antonio for a few hours. It’s so easy and convenient! And, dear Lord, Austin Airport- you are the most magical airport I’ve ever been to (*insert hallelujah hands emoji here*). No line at security AND I can take my beer to my terminal? Ohhhh, you da best.



Fresh juice from Jugo, the only healthy thing I had ingested for 72 hours- had to document. Had to!
Austin has a Voodoo Donuts now and it’s huuuuuuge!


Since downtown Austin is on a grid, getting around on foot is extremely easy. We got off of the bus, met my friend Liz for lunch at Leaf downtown (so many great healthy food places in Austin), walked to Rainy Street to gawk at the new high rise condo buildings and adorable restaurants, then crossed the river to South Congress street to window shop and conclude our Texas trip with a couple of local beers. It was a very good day.




I’m gonna have to write a blog post about all the cats we’ve met in all of the cities we’ve traveled to…










Even in the scorching Texas summertime, Austin is a great place to find yourself. We always look forward to visiting ATX and can’t wait to go back!


Ohhhh Austin, we love you so much.

The Homesick Texan


Of the people I’ve come to know since moving halfway across the country to Pittsburgh, a good chunk of them are also transplants from elsewhere. Some friends come from the other side of Pennsylvania, some are from across state lines in Ohio, West Virginia, or New York, and at least 7 of us came up north from different parts of Texas.

Although we hail from vastly different part of Texas, from the hill country to the bigger cities to the small beach towns, I can speak for all of when I say we miss it. We miss Whataburger. We miss HEB. We miss the “hi, y’alls” and the “yes ma’ams”. For those born and raised there, the pride of being a Texan runs deep. I’m kind of obsessed with being from Texas, but I definitely knew I’d leave my home state eventually. I distinctly remember being 7 or 8 years old when my dad was talking to me about one day opening a bank account at a San Antonio based bank which only had branches statewide, and in that moment thinking that wouldn’t work for me because I wouldn’t live in Texas when I grew up…

Fast forward however many years and I’ve been away from my home town long enough to miss it dearly. I miss going to the grocery store down the street from my childhood home. I miss seeing the local weatherman waiting in line for Chinese food at Firebowl. I miss the rope swing at my grandparents’ house. I miss my weirdo mom and dad. But even though there’s a lot to miss, the feeling of “going home again” can’t be beat!


In everyday life, going to the grocery store isn’t my least favorite thing to do, but it’s still a chore. Going to grocery stores in all of the different cities I’ve traveled to, however, is nothing short of fascinating! People watching at grocery stores is awesome. Finding local treats is even better! At H-E-B (arguably the greatest grocery chain of all time), I like to dawdle in the ice cream aisle and gawk at the rainbow assortment of Blue Bell Ice Cream flavors, even though I hail from a strictly Creamy Creations family. I remember being at HEB with my mom and sister last summer and inspecting every avocado in the produce section and they were all perfect. You just don’t get that amount of quality avocado up here because Pittsburgh’s simply too far from Mexico.


There are some fast food chains in SA that I always gotta go to: Taco Cabana (to get a dozen flour tortillas and a large order of queso) and Whataburger. You don’t realize how great these places are until you’re very far away from them. Joel and I joke about franchising a Whataburger (which is open 24 hours) up here by the University of Pittsburgh because we’d make a killing selling delicious food to drunk college kids. I think it’d only cost us 3 or so million, so we’ll need to start saving, like, yesterday.


Another thing I love about going home to San Antonio, once or twice a year, is getting to see how much its changed. Sure some of the old favorites are still around (like creepy AF Kiddie Park– where I found a live possum in a trash can once!), but there’s so much new new new. Even the old Witte Museum has undergone a massive facelift. The hipsters have settled into San Antonio quite nicely, making the old Pearl Brewery the place to be. I haven’t actually eaten at Taco Land, but have stopped to pay tribute to their I Love Tacos So Much mural a couple of times, naturally.



Look at this beautiful modern home in the heart of Terrell Hills! We definitely did a u-turn to get a closer look (& take some photos) of it. I wonder if the owners have any idea that they’re building a home in both Tommy Lee Jones’ and Armie Hammer’s neighborhood….


Sometimes, exploring all that is new in San Antonio and the surrounding areas can be overwhelming, which is why I love having an all inclusive tour guide (hey, dad!). After my little brother’s wedding in Seguin, TX, my dad took us to this amazing biergarten in New Braunfels (Germantown!), Krause’s. Idk if it was the beer talking or what, but Joel and I felt like we were back in Germany. We loved having the whole place to ourselves before they closed up for the night!






And what would a trip home (a trip anywhere for that matter) be without finding beautiful walls to stand in front of and have my picture taken?! San Antonio’s wall game is strong. If I still lived there, I’d never run out of blogger gal background material. Of course, the buildings surrounding my old stomping ground, Southwest School of Art, are some of the best I’ve seen anywhere! My dad, being the great tour guide that he is, spent 10 minutes on the phone telling me about all of the new murals he’d encountered before our trip. It’s street art heaven for sure.











I love going back to Texas and that we’re always so welcomed home with open arms. It’s true that I was never a “small town” girl living in a lonely world, but taking the midnight train going anywhere (to Pittsburgh, PA it turns out) was for the best. Not saying we’ll never reside permanently where the stars at night are big and bright, but periodically going back deep into the heart of Texas is my favorite thing to do.

I spy hair extensions…





Until next time, y’all! Opposite of “howdy” to ya!


The World’s Worst Twins

I can’t help but laugh at the fact that I had almost nothing to do with the coolest thing about myself. All I had to do was be born. Let me explain: I was one half of a second set of twins born to a South Texas couple in the late eighties. My twin sister and I were on the front page of the San Antonio Light and we had our own spotlight segment on the local news. It gets better, too, because a year and a half later, they did it again! ANOTHER SET OF TWINS! My parents (God bless ’em!) had 3 sets of twins in under 4 years. Six kids in diapers became six hormonal teenagers. A family of 8 squeezed into a small, 3 bedroom ranch style home. Let that sink in.


I touched on my roots briefly in this post, but have always felt compelled to write more about it all. Honestly, if we had been born 10 years later, we’d have our own reality show on TLC (Keeping Up With The Haase Twins or Two Sets Of Twins, Oh Wait There’s More). At the very least we’d have a book deal, but this is so much better. More authentic, ya know? Straight from the middle child’s mouth.

Growing up, I remember being out and about running errands (usually with one parent at a time!) and strangers would always stop to make the inevitable comment of “wow, looks like you’ve got a whole zoo there!” to which mom or dad would wittily reply “yes, and just like Noah, ours went two by two, too” or something along those lines. That’d get the whole twin conversation going, which never leaves anyone unimpressed.

Even now, after a lifetime of only knowing myself as part of this phenomenon, it still boggles my mind. I wrote a paper on us in my Child Development class in college that left my professor happily stunned. During the research phase of writing said paper, though, I learned that having multiple sets of fraternal twins isn’t nearly as rare as multiple sets of identical twins (1:500,000 compared to 1:11,000,000) but it’s still pretty damn impressive nonetheless!

My favorite question people ask us is if we’re fraternal or identical. You’d be surprised by how many people don’t realize that you can’t be identical to the twin of an opposite sex. Plus, the six of us barely pass as looking remotely related, let alone 3 sets of womb mates. That’s why we’re the world’s worst twins…

Last weekend was the first time all six of us had been together in over five years, so I took the opportunity to take updated photographs and introduce the rest of the brood on my blog.

Now, introductions!

The infamous Haase twins (annoyingly out of order because Annie, 2nd from the left but 1st born, wanted to show her “good side”), Christmas 2012

SET 1: Annie and Brennan

Born September 1988. These two could not be more different. Physically alone, he’s tall with dark brown hair and dark blue eyes. She’s short with naturally blonde hair, green eyes, and lots of junk in the trunk. As far Annie and Brennan’s personalities go, they are once again on opposite ends of the spectrum. Growing up, she was the epitome of the first born, goody-two-shoes, while Brennan (along with yours truly!) was the family’s OG rebel child.


SET 2: Sarah (me!) and Elizabeth (aka Bessie)

Born December 1989. We’re basically proof that my mom double ovulated. I am, very obviously, double the size of my twin and have been since birth. They called me “Moose” and her “Shrimp”. I wholeheartedly believe that if my mom hadn’t had the C-section when she did, Bessie would have been eaten in utero. Fun fact- she can only wink with her right eye and I can only wink with my left.


SET 3: Rebekah and Daniel

Born June 1991. I like to think of these two as the “HOLY SHIT, IT’S TWINS AGAIN?!” set because that must have been my dad’s reaction to the news of two more kids. It’s crazy that the last set of twins are the ones who are most alike both physically and personality wise, even though they’re different genders. I mean, they both like country music and have really weird looking feet. They’re the twinniest twins of all compared to the rest of us.


As you can probably imagine, growing up with this stone cold pack of weirdos was a trip. And yes our parents are obviously saints for dealing with it all. There were many fights had and pranks played, and even though I don’t think we could spend 12 hours with each other without someone getting punched, we still love each other. Last weekend, my little bro got married (making half of us Haases hitched) and it was such a great time being together and dancing the night away.

FYI to any mamas with multiple sets of twins, it’s so much harder to get them in a picture together when they’re adults! It was like herding cats trying to round us all up for these. We’d better frame ’em!



a little insight to a not-so-complicated girl